'LABISI: Chronicles of a Breast Cancer Warrior

CHAPTER 7

Journal Entry by Karen Delgado- 6/21/2010
'My new picture is of the middle school students, dressed in pink. They are in a 'breast cancer awareness' formation. In another shot, they are in the formation of 2010...the picture was used as the front cover of this year's yearbook.'

Small deeds done are better than great deeds planned- Peter Marshall

Have you ever felt so indebted to someone that you couldn't say 'thank you', because those two words couldnt adequately capture the magnitude of your indebtedness?

Have you ever willed yourself to like something beneath your taste, something otherwise tasteless to you- a bland shirt which you never would have bought if you had enough cash reserve, 'healthy' fish rather than 'unhealthy' chicken- not because you were considering the health implications but simply because you were short on cash?

Sometimes, we learn to live in situations and be thankful for them, not because we love those situations, but because well...they are here, and we'd rather wade through the storms than commit suicide.

More importantly, we sometimes choose to remain hopeful because that's the closest thing we can do to repay the kindness of those to whom we are indebted- family, friends, parents, children.

You know, I found myself in these shoes when I was handed the earth-shattering news that I had breast cancer. The mammography that changed my life was right on the heels of my 40th birthday, but that wasn't even the issue. Talk about the expenses my family incurred. The fact that because of my treatment, the kids had to be consistently harrased in school for lack of fees, that because of my chemotherapy, my husband had to sacrifice a lot from both his financial and emotional purse.

My amazing friends weren't left out, and even when I lost hope, they brightened my days on the ward.On one such day, 3 of them: Lola, Kemi and Rahmat had visited me on the ward and brought along with them, some gossip about the latest news at our place of work.

How Rukayat was the newest kid on the block with her latest RangeRover Sports which an Alhaji had bought for her (I have no idea how they knew it was an Alhaji who bought it for her, so don't ask me!).

How two of the teachers at the school where we taught, whom we had always suspected were dating had finally tendered their invitation letter before the jury, comprising of them 'amebo' teachers.

They routinely brought fruits and tins and tins of milo and milk; bottles of groundnut which I mostly couldn't touch, from themselves and sometimes the entire school. One thing that touched me the most was my students- the care they consistently showed their Home Economics teacher who was sick. I can almost never forget the look of love in their eyes.

For the sakes of all of these ones, I couldn't give up. They were more than pivotal to my ability to live through the menace which seemed to have befallen me.

And for the care in all of their eyes, I learnt to say, 'thank you'- without words.